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“Do not desire chiefly to be
cherished and consoled by God;
desire above all to love Him.
Do not anxiously desire to have others find consolation in God,
but rather help them to love God.”
~ Thomas Merton, No Man Is An Island, p.270
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Backwards
Love
We
often get it backwards and slip into one of two fallacies. Either we
work ourselves to the bone “doing the right thing” to earn the Father’s
love or we sit in silence waiting for Him to affirm His love for us.
Either way, we seek to receive love rather than give it. We continue to
make ourselves the true center of the exercise.
Merton
suggests we abandon this narcissism.
Yes,
it’s true that our best ministry comes out of security in Whose we are
(Romans 8:38-39); that our “belovedness” forms the basis for our
capacity to fully give of ourselves (Matthew 3:17); that the first work
of the Holy Spirit in the life of the believer is to pour out the love
of God in our hearts (Romans 5:5).
However,
the pathway to being loved requires first our own resolve to love.
Ironically, we usually reverse this order.
We
console those who suffer or grieve with well-intentioned statements.
“The Father sees you and cares.” “The Lord loves you even when you
don’t feel it.” And such trivialities. As though our reminders will
somehow jolt them past the harsh realities of their lives. It doesn’t
happen. And we know it. And we therefore speak the words with hints of
hesitation and doubt.
Merton
challenges this backwards love and urges us all – settled or suffering
– to love God and leave the issues of consolation aside. It defies our
common wisdom and usual practice, but it’s thoroughly biblical.
The
greatest commandment – the first of all instructions – is not to be
loved but to “love the Lord your God with all your heart, mind, soul,
and strength” (Mark 12:30). How often do we help each other love God?
Or do we more frequently sympathize with each other as we wait for Him
to show up and do something good for us?
A
student of mine described this as “moralistic therapeutic deism” – a
mouthful of a title meaning that we embrace God only when we think He
can help us, or we live decent lives as a trade for His favor.
Can
we love Him in our heartache? Can we honor Him in our hurt? Can we
glorify Him in our grief? Can we pursue Him in our prosperity? If not,
perhaps we’ve swallowed the poisonous pill of self-centeredness. We’ve
got it backwards. No wonder it doesn’t “work.”
Let’s
learn to love Him above every other pursuit of life. And may His glory
become our joy.
In
HOPE –
David
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